So much ignorance…

Another day, another one for the pile of ignorant remarks. Today we focus on a short article that attacks incest in general, and father/daughter relationships specifically. Well, I take exception to that, because this woman clearly doesn’t have a clue what she’s talking about, as you will soon see. Having actually been in a father/daughter relationship, I actually do. So let’s dive into the manure pile, shall we

Incest is a serious public health issue but it’s usually ignored in order to protect involved families.

Would that public health issue be the long discredited mutant babies argument by any chance?

Father and daughter incest is common in many African countries and as Allan Kimani, a counseling psychologist at Nairobi Counseling Services explains, many incest victims suffer from Stockholm Syndrome where they develop irrational empathy for their assailants.

That may be the case for sexual abuse cases where the daughter was underage or groomed, but you can’t categorize all father/daughter relationships as abusive. Many are not. Don’t believe me, click here.

“Whether the girl is a minor or an adult, consented or not, the girl remains a victim because the father has the upper hand in the illegitimate relationship”, says Kimani.

So according to this woman, a grown woman can’t consent to her father because he somehow still has power over her? That’s complete horse shit. If he has that kind of power, then he failed as a parent to raise her as an independant and functional adult.

And to suggest that a grown woman has no more power than a minor girl, is extraordianarily condescending and offensive. Of course it matters how old the woman is, is she a woman or a girl, there is a HUGE difference, women can consent, underage girls cannot. And to suggest that it doesn’t matter if she consented or not even when she is of legal age…. YES IT FUCKING WELL DOES. Either she is a grown woman with her own mind, or she is not. This is what I call weapons grade stupidity on part of the writer, she has no clue whatsoever, and it’s lazy and intellectually dishonest at best.

Also, ILLEGITIMATE relationship? There is nothing illegitimate about a consensual relationship between adults, no matter what their kinship is or is not.

Section 20 and 21 of the Sexual Offences Act stipulates that if two adults of close relation get involved in sex, the two are guilty of incest and can face a jail term of not less than ten years. Consequently, in the case of an adult daughter and the father, the two can be charged in court.

Which is outrageous. Neither of them should be charged with anything as they did nothing wrong. Banging people up for a decade for consensual sex is pretty extreme don’t you think.

Dr Kevin Wamula, a psychiatrist at Mathari Hospital points out that incest is more of a criminal than a mental illness. He however notes that in extreme cases between a father and daughter, mental evaluation is paramount. “The evaluation can determine whether any of the two is suffering from schizophrenia or any other mental illness,” he said.

Oh God, we’ve gone armchair psychologist now, have we? Incest is NOT a mental illness, it’s simply a type of relationship. Father/daughter relationships are NOT ‘extreme’, they can be really beautiful, mutually caring and loving. You can’t just chalk every instance of incest up as mental illness and you know it.

Schizophrenia is a mental disorder which affects how a person thinks, feels and behaves.

It’s also completely irrelevant to the topic of consenting adults being persecuted for falling in love.

Dr. Wamula advises that should a person detect that they are sexually attracted to close relatives, they should seek either counseling or mental health services to prevent regrettable situations.

THIS makes me ANGRY. The mental health of consang people is usually fine thanks very much! People who are attracted to their relatives are NOT mentally ill, they are simply misunderstood. We do not need ‘help‘ we do not need ‘therapy’ we do not need any interference. Attitudes like this make my blood boil, and they strengthen my resolve to stamp out such bigotry and ignorance.

Scientifically, a baby conceived out of such a relationship is likely to inherit genetic defects and terminating the pregnancy would be the safer option.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Immediate family run a 9% risk of something, either major or minor going wrong. This means that 91% of babies are born free from any defect. It would be better if incest was legalized, and that such couples could get genetic counselling before deciding to have a baby, this way they can make the decision based on what’s lurking or not in their genes. For some couples it might be perfectly safe, and for others not.

I am absolutely disgusted by this article, it’s packed full of ignorance, prejudice and hate. It’s bigotted and it does not understand the issues at hand. One article at a time, we will fight with facts and with passion.


9 thoughts on “So much ignorance…

    1. I’m aware of this story, and while I am sure her feelings are genuine, the fact that she was very underage (as in barely pubescent) when it started is very disturbing to me. As a mature adult I can’t understand how the father in that story could be sexually attracted to a 13 year old… that’s, not right, not by a long shot. When I see a 13 year old boy… I see a BOY, not a man. Honestly, I think in that instance he took advantage of her, even if he didn’t intend to, purely because of her young age.


      1. i think the same .genuine, but a very distinkt line must always separate do-able relations from not. yes she was a child. this in any way should put a limmit to his actions. though nobody complained.
        on the other hand haters will always be overinclusive and judge from such cases fathers as corrupt and abusive. which is sad.


      2. andreas, what do you mean when you write ‘..though nobody complained.’?
        She was 13! What her father did was wrong, wrong on so many levels. This is not even worth discussing.

        To be honest the story makes me angry because it confirms a lot of prejudices people have about consang. relationships.


      3. “i am a 28 year old career woman, a banker to be exact. i have no regrets nor am i to change my mind”
        so, neither she nor her father- both in adulthood-as the participants of this consanguinamorous relations complained about the circumstances this very relation flowerished.
        she even denotes: “don’t be hasty to judge me”
        that was my comment about. nothing more nothing less.
        whether it was “politicaly correct” to give us the link i would like and i am interested to disquss it.
        how far the prejury of others should determine our own right on critisism?
        should we also supress the naration of unsuccesful stories?
        i am really interested in your position .
        we certainly are a vey delicate fraction of a fraction and our activism poses difficult choises: does this mean we have to say half of the truth?


      4. I don’t judge her, in fact I’m sorry for her. But her story doesn’t sound healthy to me even if she says that she has no regrets. But I judge him strongly because what he did was very close to pedophilia and I consider his actions as a form of abuse.

        I’m not going to debate this with you and, again, I think it sheds a bad light on consang. relationships.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Stefan is right, what this man did to her was sexual abuse, she was an underage girl that he was in charge of, and for that reason she likely didn’t feel she could say no. If you can’t say no, then you can’t legitimately say yes. Look at it this way, can you choose to remain in a room if you’re locked in… no, because you actually don’t get the choice, even if you’re happy being in that room, you aren’t choosing to be there because you cannot choose to go somewhere else. That’s what we’re getting at here andreas. Her father has committed a serious sex offence and should be in jail. If he wanted her, he should have waited until she was an adult, it’s really very simple and there is no excuse for it. This girl was clearly brainwashed by her abuser, her dad. The age of consent laws are there for a very good reason, they’re there to prevent the young and vulnerable from being preyed upon by adults, by acting as a deterant to those who would take advantage of them. 13 is much too young to be having sex with ANYONE, let alone a parent who is responsible for looking after you at such a young age. This is why it’s wrong, and it should be very obvious and common sense to anyone.

      Stefan, I wouldn’t have chosen to cover that story anyway, it’s off topic, it’s inappropriate and it’s sick on so many levels. Like I said, I don’t understand any adult even wanting to do anything sexual with somebody so young, it makes no sense at all. If nothing else, the link and subsequent debate has more than proven that we don’t take kindly to pedophiles or their advocates, there is no justifying the unjustifiable. You’re 100% right, horrible things like this do reinforce the very negative stereotypes we’re trying to dispel. I don’t really know why he posted that link, since I was reviewing a totally different article.


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