It’s with a troubled mind that I write this, because the unthinkable has happeed. Somebody claiming to be an ally of our movement has expressed some transphobic bigotry on the forums, describing gender reassignment surgery as a ‘mutilation’, and transgender as a ‘mental illess’. Not only do I feel horrified and disgusted that anyone could think this way let alone post such obnoxious rubbish, but it comes only days after a mother of a vulnerable young transwoman signed up to the forums. I really feel for her, and hope that she takes comfort from the kind remarks of the other forum users who immediately shot him down and supported trans rights.
One of the arguments that the bigot made, was that our movement is going to be in some way harmed by our support of transgendered rights. I think I speak for us all when I call this bigot out on his hateful rubbish, and express to all that there is no room for such hate in our movement. Some transpeople are also consang, and we support all forms of love and ways of being between consenting adults. To do any less would be hypocritical, immoral, and discriminatory. How can anyone support one sexual minority of consenting adults, and deny another? The rights of people to decide who they wish to be intimate with, in what way, and what they choose to do with their own bodies are BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS. If you do not have authority and autonomy over your own body, then you are not free, it’s as simple as that.
I’m not saying that everyone must be enthusiastic about every single thing that another person may choose to do with their bodies, or even necessarily agree with it, but we should ALWAYS support a persons HUMAN RIGHT to make those decisions for themselves as they see fit. Hating on others for their sexual differences has been going on in one form or another since time immemorial. In the modern age, we as a minority are often on the receiving end of such hate, so we of all people know how it feels to be cast aside by the masses as defective and deviant. How can we, knowing how that feels do that to another minority? We can’t. Hate is always wrong.
I’m not saying that we know everything about every sexual minority, we don’t. We don’t get all of the unique challenges that transpeople go through, how could we if we are not trans ourselves? What we can do is LISTEN WITH EMPATHY and try to understand as much as we can. What we do have in common is the hateful reactions of some other people. We cannot preach empathy and understanding to regulars if we do not practice it ourselves.
Do not let bigots like this idiot win, don’t dwell on their hateful statements even for a moment, and do not take it to heart. People like that are not worth your time or energy. I’m still trying to figure out if this guy believes the horrible bile he’s been posting, or if he is trolling, either way I am not going to tolerate more of it, and I would like all readers to know that Kindred Spirits is still the place to be for consang people of all persuasions. If you’re LGBT, Poly, Kink, or whatever, YOU’RE VERY WELCOME, and we admins (as well as many of our members) will do everything in our power to make your stay comfortable and enlightening.
We need allies of course, but what we do not need is ‘allies’ who support us and hate on others, those who do such things are no better than those who support gay rights and yet deny us our rights. We can only move forward by pushing for the EQUAL RIGHTS OF ALL CONSENTING ADULTS. Minority groups need to stand united in the face of hate, we may be different, but some of the challenges we face are the same, and for much the same reasons. We are one group amongst many, so I repeat my call for friendship and solidarity with those other minorities, that the establishment of such solidarity will be of great benefit to us all. In such solidarity, we will find greater understanding of each other and strength in numbers, and that will pave the way for future generations to enjoy the freedoms we were denied. We owe this to the next generation, not just to our own people, but to all people of sexual diversity.