Underhanded and dirty tricks

Okay folks, I’m sorry not to be the bearer of good news at this time of year when we should simply be enjoying the run up to Christmas, but here goes. A while ago, our friend and ally Richard Morris of Australia submitted, for the THIRD time, a petition to legalize incest in Scotland. His previous two bids were rejected, the second of which without even being looked at properly, I saw a video of it in which it was given less than a minute of attention.

As if such ignorance wasn’t enough, Scotland is now considering changing the rules for petitions which would make it impossible for Richard to submit a fourth petition, and are currently moving to have the current petition closed. Now surely, they cannot be so afraid of what we have to say, that they will attempt to censor what is being said? Surely not?… but YES, that is EXACTLY what is happening. These individuals are so afraid of the weakness of their argument, and the strength of ours, that they would seek to deny us an audience because it offends their sensibilities.

Let me be clear, denying a point of view it’s right to speak simply because you do not like what it has to say is a form of FASCISM. Yes, that’s right, FASCISM. A real democracy would allow ALL views to at the very least be heard, even if they are later rejected. You can guarantee that they wouldn’t be looking at changing the rules if the petition was about hefty parking violation fines or the frequency of refuse collections during the summer months when the flies swarm around bins. The attempt at censorship is purely reactionary, because they are afraid of what we have to say, because it hits them at the core rather than appealing to their cerebral functions alone. The issue is devisive and emotive.  It hits them hard that we are human beings deserving of equality, because we commit the crime of being different. The same in many ways, but still different.

Granted, they may not yet be ready to accept our people fully, but that does not mean that we should be denied an audience. On the contrary, we should be debated and heard. I am confident that there is nothing any person could bring to the table which could invalidate our appeal for full equality. If there is such an argument, I am yet to hear it through these many years of my online travels, and my nearly two years of blogging on the issue. I know the answer, as do you: no such argument actually exists, hence this attempt at censorship. It stinks to high heaven of cowardice and underhandedness if you ask me. Anyone with backbone would tackle the issue at hand dispassionately, they would analyze all sides of an argument, weight up the pros and cons seriously, and then deliver their verdict… but this is not happening. It is not happening because they KNOW what that verdict would have to be, that incest would have to be legalized.

If, like me, you’re appalled at this latest outrageous display of contempt, then you can help Richard and all of us, SIGN THIS PETITION NOW WHILE YOU STILL CAN, and show them all, he is not alone. God willing, it will have an impact.

I would like to say directly now to any Scots MPS reading this article: Do not shy away from us, we are not your enemy, we are a part of your society as we are a part of every society. All we ask is to live our lives in peace. We are not threat to you, we are no threat to the family unit, we are simply a small minority seeking equal rights. We fall in love and want to settle down just like the rest of you. You may not understand us, but that can change in time and with dialogue. We’re not asking for special treatment and we are not appealing to political correctness to shield us from criticism (which would be counter productive anyway since no current criticism has gone unanswered), we simply ask for equal and fair treatment. Many people were hesitant at hearing the gay community at first… do you REALLY want to repeat the mistakes of the previous generation? The ball is well and truly in your court, kick it in whatever direction you will, but before you take that shot, consider what I have said today.

Advertisements

Is it my orientation or not?

After participation in some threads at Kindred Spirits on this issue, I thought it important to clarify some important points. Not everyone who has a consang relationship is exlusively consanguinamorous, and not everyone who has regular relationships is exclusively regular. The world is not a binary place, rather orientation exists on a scale. Much like how there are bisexuals who are not exclusively straight or gay, there are some people in the world who are halfway between regular and consang.

As I wrote in the forum topic, in order for a person to be considered fully consang, the following criteria should be met:

  1. The person has an absent or very weak Westermarck Effect
  2. Related people appear to be more attractive than unrelated people
  3. Relationships with unrelated people feel empty and hollow, like something is missing

There are many people in the world who have a weak or absent Westermarck, but are equally attracted to non-relatives and are able to feel satisfied in a relationship with them. These people are PARTIALLY consang, not exclusively.

So, if you’re wondering whereabout on the scale you are, here is my scale:

Fully Consang – You’ve always known you lack Westermarck Effect, because you’ve never shared other peoples disgust whenever incest was mentioned. You may not have understood the significance of this at first, but you did the moment you fell in love with a relative because it all fell into place for you. You’ve tried regular relationships and always felt something wasn’t quite right, you sometimes told yourself ‘there must be more to love than this’ because it left you feeling empty inside, and with no obvious reason. The moment your relative became more than just family, you understood instinctively that this was RIGHT, even though society told you otherwise, the empty feeling was gone and for the first time you felt truly whole. Now you’ve experienced consanguinamory, you know you can never go back to regular relationships because they just feel so painfully awkward, not to mention hollow! You’re exclusively attracted to family members.

Consang-Flexible – You never had much of a Westermark Effect if any at all, and other peoples disgust may have seemed to you a bit over the top. When you fell in love with a relative you too found everything falling into place. You’ve tried regular relationships, and although they don’t feel as natural to you as consang ones, you cannot rule out finding the right regular because you do feel some attraction towards some of them. Thing is, they’d have to be something pretty damn special, at the very least somebody you could connect to on a family-like level. Your primary preference though would be to date within your family.

Bisang – You too have a very weak Westermarck Effect, so you too find the disgust reaction of others over the top. You’ve fallen in love with both relatives and non-relatives, and you have no relationship preference either way. You easily see the unique characteristics of both kinds of relationship and you’re able to switch between dating a relative and dating an unrelated person pretty easily.

Regular-Flexible – Your Westermarck Effect is stronger, although not strong enough to rule out relatives completely. You usually date outside your family and you’re primarily attracted to other regulars. You probably find that you’re not attracted to most of your family, although you would under the right circumstances be willing to make exceptions to this rule, perhaps just for one particular relative whose values and personality best compliment your own. Although you’re not completely disgusted by incest, you might find the concept a little awkward, hence you’d really prefer to date somebody who isn’t related.

Regular – You have a strong Westermarck Effect, and the very thought of dating a relative is a real turn off, the concept itself feels very awkward to you, disgusting even. No way in hell could you imagine dating a family member, and even thinking about others doing it makes you feel so uncomfortable that you’d prefer not to even hear about it. You’re exclusively attracted towards people who are unrelated.

Now you’ve seen my scale, where do you lie on it? I once thought I was consang-flexible, but it turns out that I’m 100% consang. To be honest, the thought of another regular relationship is highly unappealing to me, which is why I don’t engage in them any more. Whichever point you lie on the scale, it’s okay… every bit as okay as being anywhere on the straight-bisexual-gay scale.

More double-love

A while ago I was contacted by a young man who wanted to share his story. Well, today his story of falling in love with his father landed in my inbox. As with all of my interviews, the questions are in bold and the answers are in italics:

Describe what kind of consanguinamorous relationship you’re in, or have been in?

We are in a homosexual incest relationship. We are very monogamous and want it too stay that way. I’m am a son in relationship with my biological dad who raised me. 

Describe yourself, approximate age, what kind of person are you? What are your interests and hobbies?

I’m a 19 year old man. I’m currently attending school and I’m interested in a variety of world issues and topics. I’m similar too many other 19 year olds. My dad is 53 year old and is very professional and well educated. And sexy too 😊

How did it start, and what were your thoughts and feelings at the time?

I have been attracted too my dad since puberty and we have always been comfy around each other. My dad would always walk around in his briefs and tighty whities which I really liked! Over time I took some risks and went for it bluntly and it turns out he was wanting the same-thing when I turned 18.  

How long have you been together, and what are your plans for the future?

We’ve been together as a couple for 10 months now. We want too live and stay together where we are now for good. 

Is your relationship legal where you are?

No

If you could legally marry, would you?

Of course. We would love to get married with vows. 

What would you like to say to others who disapprove of your relationship, or who want people like yourself to be thrown in jail? 

We’re both consenting adults. I understand people who don’t accept but it’s none of their business. Everyone has their opinion but it can’t infringe on our lives and who we love. 

Describe the advantages and disadvantages of consanguinamorous relationships in your experience.

Well being closeted and not being able to be open sucks but we manage because or love is strong. The big advantage is how we are perfect for each other. We have so much in common and that is something I could only get from my dad. We have a double love. 

How do you feel about your relationship now

I feel great. We’re both happy and in love. Nothing much more too say!

Before you had this relationship, what were your thoughts and feelings about others who engaged in this type of relationship?

Never really thought about it. I guess I was indifferent about the whole topic. I always believed love is love.  

What are your thoughts and feelings about consanguinamory in general now? 

As long as it’s a choice and always consenting. Then like I said. Love is love. 

What is it like, having to hide the truth from the world, and having to lie to people?

It can be hard. When your in love you want everyone to know. But as long as we have each other then we will be okay with our secret. I hope one day I can say. This is my dad and my husband/partner

What would you like say to anyone who discovers a friend or relative in a consanguinamorous relationship?

As long as it’s loving and happy, then be happy for them! Love is a great thing! Don’t let prejudice over ride you. 

Is there anything else you want to add? 

My dad/husband was here with me while I wrote this. He agrees with everything I said! 

There you go, the words of a clearly happy and confident young man looking forward to many years with his dad. I’d like to thank him for sharing his story and wish them the very best for the future.

As a general reminder, anyone else wanting to share should visit this page and then e-mail me at janedoeofks@protonmail.com

Lasting Love

You know, I absolutely love reading real life love stories that just make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Well today I have one such story for you sent in to me by one of my readers, in response to a set of questions I composed for the purposes of allowing people to share their experiences anonymously. For the sake of clarity, the questions are in bold and the answers are in italics.

Describe what kind of consanguinamorous relationship you’re in, or have been in?
I am involved in a monogamous relationship with my biological son
Describe yourself, approximate age, what kind of person are you? What are your interests and hobbies?
I would say I’m just an average ordinary person. I’m soon to be 68 and look like a typical American woman. I try to keep myself in somewhat good shape. I think I’m a good person and always thought I was a good mother and I still do. I’m mostly a home body. We never really went out a lot and we just enjoy our home. I like too cook, read, watch TV.
How did it start, and what were your thoughts and feelings at the time?
My husband left soon after he was born and we were alone much of the time. He started having feelings for me in his mid teens but never acted on them. Once he graduated high school, I made a comment saying I need to see him as a man now. He took it in a different way and asked me out on a date. He was the perfect gentleman but at the end he kissed me. Not like a mother but like a woman.
We kissed for a second or two but then I pulled back and had to leave.
After I thought about it, I felt terrible I had rejected him so abruptly. I went back and spoke with him and told him it just took me by surprise and I had no idea he had those feelings for me. So I suggested we go on another date and I will be prepared. He said to me know one knows we kissed and no one has to know anything. I thought about his word  a lot.
We went out and ended up making out at the end of the night. That second date I started with the romantic feelings for him. He had felt my breasts and I really enjoyed it. The third date we had another talk and I just wanted to make sure this is what he really wanted and where it was leading and to make sure no one would ever know. After that date I said I’m going into my room and he could come if he wanted and we started our sexual relationship right then
How long have you been together, and what are your plans for the future?
We have been together 27 and a half years. I never thought it could last this long but it did and its for life now
Is your relationship legal where you are?
Yes it is He researched the incest laws in the USA and we moved to Rhode Island where any two consenting adults can have sex regardless of relationship
If you could legally marry, would you?
Yes we have said vows to each other just can’t be legal
What would you like to say to others who disapprove of your relationship, or who want people like yourself to be thrown in jail?
I am not hurting anyone. My son was an adult and we both can choose who and how we want to love. If you don’t agree that’s fine just leave us be
Describe the advantages and disadvantages of consanguinamorous relationships in your experience.
I’m with the man I have loved his whole life. We have love on so many levels. Its the perfect love I call it. I would love to introduce him as my son first then as I my husband but we are not at that point in society yet.
How do you feel about your relationship now?
I am proud of who I am and what I have become. I don’t consider our incest to be a dirty word and I have no issue saying I am an incest mother. I’m with the man I belong with. He just happens to be my son
Before you had this relationship, what were your thoughts and feelings about others who engaged in this type of relationship?
Honestly I was so naive I never really thought it existed. This was before the internet/ Incest always had me picturing a dirty old uncle or something like that
What are your thoughts and feelings about consanguinamory in general now?
Adult and Choice. As long as those 2 are followed I am all for it
What is it like, having to hide the truth from the world, and having to lie to people?
Been doing it so long its second nature now. My son has a good job and we can’t afford it to be known but I don’t deny or hide it when asked.
What would you like say to anyone who discovers a friend or relative in a consanguinamorous relationship?
As long as adult and consenting, its none of your business. Just leave them be
Is there anything else you want to add?
I always tell people to be prepared for what they are getting into. This is not a porno movie. It’s the real world. It is a wonderful loving situation. You feel more like a mother then ever before but it can be very challenging. But always communicate and you will be fine
Well folks, there you have it, the words of a strong and proud consang mother, after an incredible 27 years of love. Congratulations to both of them on the long term success of their relationship 🙂
If YOU would like to anonymously share your story with the world, check out this page for hints and tips, and read the other stories sent in to my website. Any submissions should be e-mailed to me at janedoeofks@protonmail.com